Children's self-esteem is a very fragile and shapeable thing.
A parent's parenting style has a large influence on their children's
self-esteem. There are four main parenting types: Uninvolved, Permissive,
Authoritarian, and Authoritative.
Permissive parents rarely discipline their children, but are very
encouraging in their child’s endeavors.
This leads to a child whose self-esteem is unrealistically high. Children with extremely high self-esteem tend
to be aggressive and lash out when they meet a task that is challenging.
Authoritarian parents are the exact opposite of permissive parents. Authoritarian parents frequently discipline
their children, often harshly, and rarely praise or “love on” their
children. This type of parenting leads
to children with extremely low self-esteem.
The children of these parents tend to need constant reassurance. Children with low self-esteem have a higher likelihood
of being anti-social.
Authoritative parents are considered the best type of parents. Authoritative parents, like authoritarian,
establish rules and expect them to be followed.
However, when the child is not compliant, the parent disciplines, but
explains why they were disciplined and reasons with the child. Children of authoritative parents feel good
about themselves. They are taught to set worthwhile and reachable goals.
Before you begin to discipline your child, I think it is best to implement the stop light method of reasoning.
Red light: Stop all actions.
Yellow light: Think of your options, and how they will effect your child and the situation you are in.
Green light: Decide on a solution and act on it. If you see that it is not going to be a successful outcome, return to red light.