In todays world mothers are returning to work 6 weeks after the birth of a
baby. Some return much earlier. This is a tough situation, however two incomes
are necessary for most families to get by on with todays economic situation as
it is, to financially get by. People from older generations frown upon this and
have plenty of negtive comments about parents who are 'choosing' their careers
over taking proper care of their children. This of coarse is an inacurate
judgement that adds to the maternal pressures of having to go back to work.
Guilt, and anxiety over adequet child care overcome most mothers reentering the
work field after giving birth. Most mothers do not intuitivly desire to leave
their babies in the care of others while they go out to work.
Choosing proper child care for the infant/toddler is very important
during this crucial time of development. If the child is in less than nurturing,
caring hands this can prove to be detrimintal. Research has found that leaving a
child in inadequit child care, leaving child for extensive periods of time, and
pressures on the mother from working 2 full time jobs (work and parenting), can
leave the youngsters at risk for attatchment insecruity and adjustment problems
as well as many other developmental delays and emotional problems.
Where i live adequit, top knotch child care can be found but
usually by being put on a waiting list, comes with a large tab and is usually in
the largest town in your region. This is usually not convienient nor affordable
for your average mother earning less than the day care costs per week. So they
settle for the girl down the street who stays home with her own children looking
for some extra cash, but not necessarily interested in your childs developmental
stages. Theres also the scenario where the provider has that is available hasn't
enough adults per child ratio to provide proper supervision as well as
individual nurturing the child would othewise recieve at home.
Many parents are scouting out child care before conception. This
notion is veiwed as a bit anal where i'm from, however very smart from my
perspective. Once a child care provider is chosen a parent should never stop
being on gaurd. And never doubt a hunch. Mabey it isn't what it seems but when a
child is at risk for harm of any kind, be it physical, emotional, or
psycologically,(and all children are at some level of risk of this daily),
something that doesnt seem right should never be disregaurded. Our society has
demanded women return to work shortly after child birth but this doesnt have to
be a negative experience for the family. Choose a provider carefully and never
quit paying attention.
I absolutely agree on everything you said. I have seen bad day-care scenarios and I am now with an individual that lovingly cares for my son & will care for my newborn as well. These are few and far between:to be able to find on one hand the personal touch of a single caregiver who lovingly nurtures our son and also the strength of her raising her own children well, and providing that wisdom onto us as well as through our son. I have often though about finding a daycare like "The Center" that would give the cognitive development that a baby needs, but I have found the oasis in the desert with this single person who has the personal care you find in a mother and the positive environment in which to learn in also. - David Adams
ReplyDeleteI agree with you and David, although i do not have kids i have worked for some daycares around where I live and more often then not they are short handed and overpopulated with kids. I have seen cases where some kids were treated differently then others and others where they didnt do anything all day but watch tv, which is far far far away from being conginivly stimulating. Its hard to find daycare today especially good ones that come with a big bill. I think the hardest part about finding a daycare is trust. they may seem like a great place and have nice people but sometimes that doesnt mean anything. So i think it really comes down to two options paying high dollars for a stimulating daycare, or just finding something you can afford that will get your kid by. There is another option of staying home but very little familys have the privlige of haveing one bread winner for their family. Its a very stressful situation with not alot of options. Brittanie Bennett
ReplyDeleteYour post TOTALLY reminded me of when I had my oldest daughter. I was working 2 jobs, and when holding my 3 mo. old i realized the mother-child bond was not there, and that she was attached to my mother, who was my babysitter. So, I quit one of my jobs and started to repair my relationship w my newborn. Today, we are close but I still can't help but to wonder if I damaged her in those three months. I really wish I had taken this class before I had kids. Maybe I wouldn't feel so guilty. Zara Foley
ReplyDeleteChildcare is a tough issue. How much is too much? Most families need to have both parents working. That was the case at our house. I had a terrific boss. He had four kids of his own. His wife was a stay at home parent. He knew the importance of having mother and child together. When we adopted our first daughter I was going to quit work and stay home. He did not want me to quit. He let me bring my daughter to work with me. I did this until she was about a year old. I did quit at that time and stayed home until she started preschool. Then I went to work part-time. After the adoption of our second daughter, four years later, I found it necessary to go back to work. I took her to a good friend for daycare. I never felt like she was more attached to the babysitter. It was a great experience for us. I know that is not always the case. Our family was lucky.
ReplyDeleteSusan Davis